Dude, you're young...you'll get to where you want to be in time. Just stay disciplined, you're on the right path.razr390 wrote: ↑Wed Nov 18, 2020 4:47 pmYeah, we aren’t really where we want to be. We don’t have enough saved up to throw at a down payment on a house without burning our reserves. Our biggest gripe is we spend too much on eating out. shit.Detroit wrote: ↑Wed Nov 18, 2020 4:26 pm
I'm not sure this is a generational thing as much as it's a life stages thing. I remember people going nuts at that age with reckless abandon. They either figure it out or don't. The key, as always, is to live at or preferably below your means always. I bought my first house at 28, and it was on the low side of our budget in a pretty crappy area of Detroit. Wife found a job, I got a raise, we moved up. Another raise, we moved up again.
But to bring this back to the point of this thread...the hardest trap to not fall into is the constant drive for more and better and whatnot. We did it with our house in the city, then the wife lost her job, I got a pay cut (though only briefly), and the sobering reality of our constant drive for bigger/better set in and made us reprioritize things. We can no longer "Afford" our house in the city, so we're taking the opportunity to simplify. I can't begin to express how lucky I am to have found our new house from our friend, it's enabling us to live in an area that we otherwise wouldn't afford (Old Mission Peninsula is AF, especially on land with water access like we have). But the house needs work and the timing was not the best, so we're making it work hell or high water.
Money can buy many things. Stuff, sure...but also freedom. Living significantly below our means has taken all the pressure we used to feel off work. Wife hasn't found a job yet, but that's OK because she's working her butt off (almost literally) on the move and getting the new house situated. It's not a big deal at all because we can more than afford it on my salary alone. Once we're in and settled, if I get forced back to the office, I can just quit and do whatever basic job I can find and still make the mortgage. But more likely, I'll maintain my job and sock as much money away as I can for the ultimate freedom of no longer being tied to the man.
Plus, costs are crazy. Diapers, toys, etc. but what I will say is at least we know where our shortcomings are and try to improve it. Sometimes after a long day we are both so mentally burned out from work/kid/etc that we just grab chipotle on the way home. It seems problem free but it adds up. Convenience costs a lot.
Currently rocking 2 car payments, rent, and all expenses on basically 1 income. We have a plan to attack some major costs but that’ll take some time.
I have no desire for more materialistic shit anymore. I occasionally make a small impulse buy or whatever, but I haven’t bought a new iPhone, or new phone case since the XS I got (2 years ago), biggest purchase/transaction I made on shit was the black wheels in June 2020, and that was minimal (just a trade) + cash.
I think it’s more important to know where you are and where you want to be, play the long game. We’d love a house for the space and privacy but our 2/2 in a good area 10 mins from my job is under $1/sq ft which is
I honestly don't know how you folks with kids do it. Not just the direct cost of kids, but the indirect like being too worn out to cook dinner so you go out, paying to have certain things done because you're wiped out...it's intense. When both the wife and I worked, dinner was out all the time due to convenience. Adding a kid on is just Also part of why we chose to not go down that path. Regardless, I don't think you can really beat yourself up about going out frequently...you've got a lot on your plate IMO.
It took me longer than you to stop caring about material things. That'll probably treat you well but at the same time, I think it's important to recognize that everyone values things differently. Some folks really like buying things, and there's nothing wrong with that since we need the economy to keep going to keep us all employed. The key is consume within your means, which many don't.